Top 5 Unintentionally Terrifying Ad Campaigns

Advertising is everywhere.  You can’t escape it.  Sometimes it makes you hungry.  Sometimes it makes you want to buy stuff.  And sometimes it haunts your nightmares.  In this post, I will go through five of the most frightening ad campaigns I can think of.  What these advertisers were thinking, no one knows.

5. Burger King

This one was so obvious, I had no choice but to include it here.  Because it’s so overly discussed, however, that’s why I put it at the bottom of the list.  Not much can be said about this guy that hasn’t already been said online, on television, in stand-up comedy, etc.  Why they thought that this frightening plastic grin would help sell hamburgers is anyone’s guess.

 

4. McDonald’s

The other obvious candidate for this list.  Just searching on Google for the image to use here brought up a huge amount of selections comparing Ronald McDonald to the Joker.  Enough said.  Who out there doesn’t have a clown phobia?  They’re creepy!  So the powers that be decided the best mascot for their burger chain would be the subject of one of the top major fears from which people suffer.  Why didn’t they just make their mascot a giant spider who has to speak in public while dangling from a great height?  Oddly enough, Ronald never scared me as a kid, not like that freak-show Bozo the Clown used to. (shudder)  And honestly, the scariest thing about Ronald for me is the ad where real men named Ronald McDonald talk about how they like Burger King.  All I can think of is, “What kind of sadistic freak would actually saddle their poor innocent baby with the name Ronald McDonald?”  Things that make you wonder.

3. Quizno’s

Honestly, I have no idea what was going through the minds of the people that created this monstrosity.  “Hey, guys, you know what will sell more sandwiches?  Mutant Rats from Hell!”  Out of all the things they could pick, they decided to go with something that crossed a Tribble with a Langolier and then screeched out their song in such a way that made you long for nails on a chalkboard.  I remember when it came out, my grandmother flat out refused to ever eat there again, simply because their commercials were so horrific for her to even look at the screen.  Great job, advertisers!  Don’t believe me?  Check out this commercial here (if you dare): Terrifying Quiznos Commercial

2. Coca-Cola

To be fair, Coca-Cola has had some really great hits with their advertising campaigns, from Santa to the polar bears.  But good lord, what is wrong with this kid?  Just what DO they put in Coca-Cola anyway?  This kid looks like he has either had too much Coca-Cola, or he really needs one badly, and will eat your face if you stand in his way.  Just a hint for advertisers, a tweeked out kid that looks like he will steal your soul is probably not who you want representing your product.

1. Toys R Us

Ok, this one may be a more personal decision, and it may not have affected you like it affected me, because my mind tends to work in more of a skewed manner.  Who out there doesn’t remember the iconic jingle, “I don’t want to grow up, ’cause if I did, I wouldn’t be a Toys R Us kid?”  That simple, catchy jingle constantly sent a chill of ice down my spine every time I heard it.  This wasn’t just telling me I should go out and buy more toys.  This was telling me that my toy-playing days were limited!  I only had a few good years left in which I could safely enjoy my Barbies, my Care Bears, my Popples, and my board games.  And then, once I reached a predetermined age, the age of “growing up,” I would somehow be rendered unable to play with toys and must therefore be flung into the realm of boring adulthood.  This was my first taste of being faced with my own mortality, forcing me to look into the depths of my soul, and to ponder what life was really all about.  What if I couldn’t play with my toys?  What would be the point of it all?  Fortunately, I discovered as I grew up that you are never really too old to play with toys, so I never really had anything to worry about.  But it was pretty traumatizing there for a while!

Can you think of any other ads that you’ve seen that fill you with the cold touch of dread?  Comment below!